In my first book I talk about how much I love Halloween…and sarcasm. That’s right. I have never really been a fan of the frightful holiday. Masks smell weird, anything scary is the opposite of a good time and the FDA has allowed chocolate to taste even more generic and non-chocolatey than ever. But probably the biggest turn off for me is that I feel like it gives people an excuse to hide behind a lot of bells and whistles. Or in this case, make-up and fake blood. 

Well, in a surprising turn of events, during one of my more recent micro aggressive spiels about October 31st, the person I was talking to commented back that maybe this wasn’t a holiday where everyone is hiding behind a costume. Maybe it’s a time when some people can dress up and feel the most like themselves. They can feel accepted to be whoever they want to be. What the wha?

This has had me in pause ever since. Not the kind of pause that renders me completely useless. I’m still managing to adult and parent and be present for my 9 to 5 (or on some days, more like 9 to whenever). But it’s allowed me to release some of my hatred about it all. This year, my go-to was not “I hate Halloween”, but more like “it’s not my favorite” or “it’s not meant for me”.

You know what is my favorite? 

One of my favorite things in life is (the act of) oversharing. So as an oversharer it would make initial sense that a holiday about costumes and masks may cause me to clam up a bit. Can’t we just be ourselves people? Society struggles a lot with this concept already. Must we encourage masked behavior?

With this being some people’s favorite holiday, I’ve decided I don’t have to hate, I just need to practice stepping aside a bit. Let Halloween lovers everywhere do their thang, but I would kindly ask that you please let me get out of the way first. Save your scares and spooks for someone who appreciates them. And if that still makes me the equivalent of a Halloween scrooge then I guess “bah-humbug”…or should I say “trick nor treat please”.

I don’t know if I’ll ever be completely on board with Halloween, but this slight shift in thinking is kind of a huge thing for me. So I’m going to let that be enough for now.

Releasing some hatred you’ve been storing up, be it around certain holidays, events or dare I say even people, is a huge accomplishment. Most likely you’re noticing that it’s only really been bringing you down all this time. It’s your energy that’s consumed. Not someone else’s. And yes, that can be a bit angering in and of itself, but all the more reason to be proud of yourself. Sometimes it just takes time and extra perspective before we can see releasing pent up feelings as even an option. 

If you haven’t gotten there yet, that’s okay, go easy on yourself. Just like me and Halloween, you shouldn’t feel pressured to participate. Maybe next year you’ll feel more like stepping aside.